Vegas - This Time with Less Running Day 2

Breakfast

We met up with the team for a late breakfast at Bouchon. My hope was that this would be a good mix for the group for the whole trip. Some nice pastries, fruit and more savory stuff in case of hangovers. Didn't work out but you never know when traveling.

We ordered and then waited about 15 minutes for the guy to come over and let me know that the Boudin Blanc I ordered wasn't available. I took his suggestion for the corned beef but it was just kind of annoying that it took that long to find out the dis wasn't available. They then eventually brought out half the table's food and we waited another 5 for the rest. Lame.

The food was fine but the portions were ridiculous. Part of why I picked the frenchy spot was thinking it might be well done food on European portions. My wife was delivered a full pound of bacon and we would up leaving a net of 3 breakfasts on the table. The food was fine, not great but fine and I doubt I'll go back.

From there we split up a bit. The girls to the pool and or shopping, Dan to the dice tables and me and g$ to the poker room. On the way to the poker table we stopped at the sports book to look at the NBA lines and put some silly money toward the Euro soccer national championships or whatever the hell it was. We were clueless and threw money away. Even more clueless-ly we ordered drinks from the cocktail waitress and she came back wanting money. There was something about a drink ticket but I only had the betting ticket so it cost $15 for 3 beers. This began a pattern of not drinking at the Venetian. Boo.

Before hitting the table I decided to cash in the match play money they gave me at check in. Having not read the fine print I soon found that I had to first sign up for the players card and then I could only put the coupon down an even money bet in an equal amount to actual cash. By this time I didn't care so me and my pretend $25 went to the craps table and after alot of excitement I wound up with a $5 profit and no drinks.

I've been playing some online poker again in the run up to the trip and put together a little stake but I'm still not much as a live player. We opened a 1-2 NL table at the Venetian and played for a few hours. I think made my buy in plus 150-200% based on 1 giant hand and a only 1 or 2 others. The action was sorta choppy for the first bit. Opening raises ranged from the minimum $2 to a healthy $12. Early on I had an A-K and led out with $7, fold all around. A guy from Kentucky to the dealer's immediate left was playing kind of aggressive, big opening and continuation bets and he didn't get called down for anything. On the good hand he limped along with another guy and I made it $12 to go from the button with JJ. KY called and I think the other guy bailed. The board comes J-2-2 and he bets out around $20. I almost raised but at the last second decided to call and let him keep firing. I didn't see him improving whatever he had unless he made quads. Turn is a blank and he fires again. Maybe $40 this time and I call. River brings an A and he checks. I go all in and he calls immediately. He turns over A-2, 2s full which obviously loses to my Jacks full. After I doubled up so quick I was a little reluctant to mix it up and only got into one other decent hand that the crazy lady at the end finally laid down.

The table was fine and had all the requisite poker weirdos. To my left G$, no additional commentary required. To his left a young asian kid with more money than sense but obviously plays alot. He has all the mannerisms down, the way he flings his chips, holds his cards. He has spent alot of time cultivating an image. Next is a kind of disheveled (clean just sort of untucked and slouchy) white guy who played only for big raises. I kind of think he was a good player but have no evidence to prove it. Next is the dealer played by the 4 generic stereotypes: asian lady who likes to talk trash, young asian guy who is just biding time until he can play again, old white guy who 'has a few stories from back when the stardust was a real swank joint' and young white guy who was just bad in high school We had 2 of the young white guy clones who appeared to literally be the same guy they were so identical. Next was KY guy. He is easily tiltable, drinks, goes to strip clubs, hunts, golf, cheats on his wife and goes to Sunday school. Kind of your standard cultured-version redneck. Next is a workout guy who has no idea what he is doing but likes the rush of the game. Next is Long Island lady, she is on her second marriage and came to the game through her husband who has money. Her home games with the ladies are pretty loose and her play is wild. Next is grumpy old guy, solid player who is not enjoying sitting by LI lady. Next is an older black guy, he isn't very good but he like to call bets so we keep him araound as long as possible. Last is KY's buddy who is a poker junkie and probably organized the trip for his buddies who by the way keep drifting in and out and each is more cheesburger-filled than the last. These guys could lay waste to a buffet.

After Tiger made his inevitable charge to twin the US Open I finally convinced G$ it was time to roll out. We'd had 1 drink at the table and said we'd wait for 1 more before we rolled out. This ended up being 20 minutes. Boo Ventian, bad form.

From there we headed over to the King of casinos, my new home away from home, the place where everyone knows your name, where the women are ugly, the men are desperate and the drinks flow freely. The Casino Royale.

I bought of a share G$'s crap dice and began angling to figure out how to get a drink. I sat down at the video game 3 card poker which is really too silly of a game for me to describe and made a few bucks and had a few gin and tonics. When the fake boobs of the fake video dealer no longer intrigued me I decided to sit down at the live 3 card game and play 'for real'. The other players were gin-soaked hard luck types. My people. The old lady running the table who had the whole thing figured out was named Lois or Babs or something. From Chicago but lives now in Goodyear, bright orange tan, lots of lame diamond jewelery and bleached blond hair. To my right was a lesbian couple. A tall white girl who played forward for the Univ. of Texas and was as tall as me and her partner who I got more of a coach vibe from was 5'5 and black. I started off playing drunk so I could pretend not to listen to Babs but eventually I got fully drunk and me and the lesbians had a good time screwing around with Babs. I lost some money but let me say it was some of the best I've spent. The drinks didn't stop and we laughed the whole time.

Dan and G$ eventually picked me up and we rolled back to the Venetian to buy cigars. We also stopped off at the faux Mexican place by the faux canal with the faux gondoliers singing a very operatic version of 'Volare' every 5 minutes while morons snapped pictures. Turns out mojitos were good but a little faux and Cabo Wabo margaritas were real and great. I also think we ate a little chrorizo and cheese and that someone who is not me spilled a huge drink on the table/floor. Cigars procured we met the girls and headed for Lotus of Siam.

We opted for cabs this night as its much closer. The place smells a little fishy and looks pretty dumpy but I don't care. Its a top 10 place.

When you go don't mess around. Get the appetizer that has sour sausage and the jerky one and the satay at an absolute minimum. From there we sort of let Dan and the waiter take over handling several bottles of wine and picking the rest of the food. We had a soup that was so hot it was making everyone cough followed by the drunken noodle sea bass, crispy duck, chicken on noodles and some green beef. For dessert that no one had room for they brought out the coconut ice cream, sticky rice and mango. All I can say is sooooo good.

I didn't make any notes from this meal, you just have to go and experience it yourself.

Cabs over to the Stratosphere so the Tinas could ride the retardedly high roller coasters and the rest of us could shoot craps again. We faded a couple of good shooters and made some money. More interesting than the game was the environment. First was the pimp that walked through causing a wake of awe and disbelief all around him. He was head to toe in white and tan with a white sort of top hat and an impressive weave full of big curls. You don't often see a man that sure of himself. Gerhard got nominated to hold all the purses but the cigar he was chewing made him look more like a skinny bodyguard than a skinny guy just holding purses. The dealer from OK who was a nice enough guy but porcine and farted at one point. He needs to improve his diet because it made an odor that told us he was terribly unwell. I know for sure it was him (and not me you accusers) because when he reached over to the pay the line he brought a foul wind of destruction with him.